12 Things I Want My Boys to Know When They Grow Up

Two thirds of my children are currently little boys who will grow into men one day.  For quite a few years, I was only a mother of boys.  My daughter, Luna's, birth last year made me a mother of boys and a baby girl.

As my boys grow older, I find myself thinking about all the things I want them to know, believe, or be capable of doing when they leave the nest.  Society has such warped views for men and masculinity.  I hope my two sons grow up to be who they are not a reflection of what society wants them to be.

Here are just a few things I want my boys to know before they leave the nest, in no particular order:

  1. Fathers are just important as mothers and their role should be as valued and as active.
  2. Men are not dumb dimwitted or irrelevant in marriage, life, or parenthood
  3. Value your role, value yourself, and find someone who will do the same.  
  4. How to cook and manage money.   Men can clean the house too. They can do just as good of a job and just as many chores. Housework is not just the wife, mom, or woman's responsibility.
  5. Being a good person, being a good husband, and being a good father is more important and more valuable than conforming to warped societal views on what is masculine and what is appropriate for a man to do. 
  6. Sometimes you have to sacrifice money for family, because family is more important. 
  7. It's okay to be angry. It's okay to be sad. It's okay to have feelings. 
  8. Respect yourself. Respect your significant other. Expect them to do the same. 
  9. Find a woman who is with you because she wants to be in not because she needs to be; someone who is independent and able to take care of herself and does not need or use you for your money or your possessions but sees the value of you as a person. 
  10. Know your self-worth. 
  11. In your marriage or relationship, it's okay to walk away and take a break but never give up if there's hope for future. A good marriage and a good love is based on two people's willingness to fight for each other and for their life together.
  12. Housework and child rearing is not just for women. 
What are some things you hope your children will leave the nest knowing?

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